Snow

In the morning

The view from my living room

The balcony (at least 5 inches of snow!)

The view from my dining room

Report back from my teen. 

"went skiing today, and it has put me off for a while, well i'm certainly not going skiing again in the vosges.

 it was -15 at one point and i told them i was too cold so i went to the car early with my correspondant. thank fuck i couldn't even think or feel anything.

last night went to a party the frogs organized for us and it was... well you can insert any word in the dictionary and it would be right.. us English made it otherwise i would have fucked off.

 & don't worry i was drunk (don't get angry, look it's HONESTY) but i didn't even kiss anyone for god's sake let alone have sex (i think you're worried about that). and i was the only one i can assure you.

 it was a mental night. we only got home at 2 though (not too late) but we had to wake up at 8 and i've felt really ill all day.. i think it's a mix of freezing temp, smell of meat in this resto, no sleep, etc.
it's a competition of who can resist the urge to run away the longest here... we all hate it because it's freezing and it's a shit hole.

tomo we are going to Strasbourg from 7 till 8h30!!!! so long day and so boring..
the divide is well funny like Les Anglais are in one corner and the Frogs in the other.
I miss you alot and the really warm weather in ldn.

here you get a moany message too:
their bloody accents!!!!!! so provincial. it drives me crazy.
and im so tired always.
and i hate these french people and their pathetic little village.
and THE COLD MAN. 

i've got another warm jacket given to me so it'll be better tomo.
O omg. I'm so tired all the time.
Family are okay they give me alcohol so it makes up for everything else... don't worry it's just at dinner. It's so cool.
sooooooooo boringgggggggggg. I wish I was in LDN so much: no school, snowing, warm. etc.

Yep the french did come with to strasbourg today but it's not like that made a difference, we never talk to them and they HATE us (especially me )..."

The family give her alcohol every night?

Everybody but her had sex at the party?

Did I read that right?

Teenage kicks

My daughter is now in France on the exchange trip. I got virtually tear-stained desperate texts on the first (Thursday) night.

"I'm scared. It's awful here. I love you so much now."

On Friday evening I got the news that my daughter's best friend, who was still in London, had called the school saying that there was a bomb. She then called the police to repeat the same warning. The police traced the call and caught her at a phone box near the school. Helicopters, two police vans, several police cars and sniffer dogs arrived. The whole operation cost over £100,000. 

Some of the pupils at this school, the Lycée francais in London, are diplomat's children. In fact the girl's sister is Madonna's daughter's best friend. A threat like that would be taken extremely seriously.

The entire school, almost 4000 children, were evacuated to a nearby park. This was done within 10 minutes. The children were told that there was a bomb warning. Some of the smaller children were cold, they had no time to pick up their coats. But nobody panicked. 

My daughter's best friend spent the day in prison and has been expelled. Her parents are mortified. Her father, who is Syrian, no doubt spent a few uncomfortable hours with the police. Their house was searched.

My teen messaged me on Friday from Facebook, so annoyed.

"I've been waiting for years for something like that to happen. Why didn't she do it while I was at school? Why did she do it while I was away?"

I think things must have improved on the exchange visit because I haven't heard from my teen since.

Update: the girl did the fake bomb message to avoid a history test that afternoon. Love it. Teenagers eh? 

Like a virgin

Talking about my teenager's trip to rural France (tomorrow yikes!) a friend from the Irish countryside said

"Well of course in the countryside, all teenagers do is have sex. There is nothing else to do. When I came to London I met people that didn't get round to having sex until they were 21, they were so busy".

That evening I asked my daughter:"Are you going to have sex in France?"

Spluttering her tea she said:"NO!"

"In fact I'm so sick of hearing about sex. That's all they talk about at school. The more they talk about it, the less I want to do it. One girl writes 'I love sex' all over her pencil case and her exercise books. It's pathetic. I know for a fact that she's only had sex once. And she didn't even like it. But she keeps making out like she loves it. To be popular."

It is moments like this that I truly love my daughter and think that I must be doing something right. 

I was at school near Swiss Cottage and we had to walk to Belsize Park to play tennis. There must have been rehearsal studios there because every week we would see men with long hair and guitars unloading their van. One week, a group of us 14 year old schoolgirls were standing around watching them when one of the men stopped unloading. He perused our group and commanded

"Hands up who's a virgin!"

Embarrassed, our hands remained firmly next to our sides except for an orthodox Jewish girl, Esther, who wore thick round glasses and had her hair in pigtails. She was the only one who didn't hitch her school skirt up to look like a mini-skirt. She said daily prayers over her packed lunch. 

Esther proudly put up her hand with the enthusiasm of a pupil knowing the answer to a teacher's question.

The group of long-haired men laughed.

A few weeks later I recognized the same men on the TV, they were a band called Thin Lizzy. 

The school trip looms...

My teenager and I are both anxious about the school trip to Epinal next week.

"Mum, I don't want to goooo" she says.

We looked at pictures of her 'correspondant', the girl she will stay with.

"She's a geek!" declares my teenager in dismay.

"I'm sure she's very nice" I reply firmly but note that both parents are accountants.

My daughter and her friends have started a special group on Facebook, inviting the exchange students to join. The London lycée students are talking, with awe, about the fact that the students from Epinal are allowed out till midnight on weekdays and 3 a.m. on weekends.

"That's because they are in the countryside" I explain "they probably just hang out at each other's houses or play babyfoot in the local tabac. It's not like they are out clubbing, as they would be if they lived in London."

The return exchange happens in March, when they come to us. No way are they going out till midnight or 3 a.m. in London, I don't care what her parents have given permission for or what the form says. 

Interesting random fact: people from Epinal are called 'Spinaloi's'.

School trip

My teenager is going on her first school trip abroad in January. I have been given a form to fill out, firstly about my teenager and also about the exchange student I will get in return. Except my daughter had already filled it out and signed it with my signature.

Would you be willing to accept someone of the opposite sex?(only if he is cute apparently)

Will your exchange student have their own room?(yeah, what if they are total neeks?)

Religion? My daughter wrote "NO!!!"

Does your family currently practise this religion? "NO!!!"

Does your son/daughter have any special dietary requirements? "Vegetarian but eat fish. No meat which means no chicken." (The French need this spelt out.)

Does he/she have any allergies to particular foods? "Anything green!"

Only a French school would have questions like:

Do you give permission for your son/daughter to:
Go out without adult supervision (Yes)
To smoke (No)
To drink alcohol with meals (Yes)

Would you be willing to accept in your home a child who smokes?(NO!!! I finally splutter)

Personality: Do you consider your son/daughter to be:-

She has answered already.

"calm" (yes)"open" (no) "enthusiastic" (no) "easy-going" (no) "young for his/her age" (no) "energetic"(yes) "shy"(yes) "mature"(yes)?

My daughter then wrote under: Any further details which are useful or which would assist in finding a partner for your son/daughter: "David Bowie obsessive and Morrissey. Individualist. Rebel.". 

(Bowie is her latest thing. I've had to get out my David Bowie fanclub membership material from the early 70's).

"I just want a crap family like ours. You know. Crap but good." My teenager says.